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Framing Yourself Outside of Your Trauma

By Ka'ra Johnson | February 17, 2025

Trauma has a way of embedding itself into the stories we tell about ourselves. It can become the lens through which we view the world and define our identities. While acknowledging trauma is an essential part of healing, it’s equally important to recognize that we are so much more than the pain we’ve endured. Framing yourself outside of your trauma is not about ignoring or dismissing your experiences—it’s about reclaiming your narrative and embracing the fullness of who you are.

Acknowledging the Weight of Trauma

Trauma leaves an imprint. It can shape how you think, feel, and respond to the world. For many, the effects of trauma can feel like an ever-present shadow, influencing decisions, relationships, and self-perception. But it’s important to remember: trauma is something that happened to you, not something that defines you.

Healing begins with acknowledgment. Validating your pain, grieving your losses, and giving yourself permission to feel are crucial steps in the process. However, the next step is asking yourself, “Who am I beyond this?”

Understanding the Power of Identity

Our identities are multifaceted, made up of our passions, dreams, relationships, and values. When trauma becomes the central part of your identity, it can limit your ability to see the richness of your life and potential. Reframing your identity means shifting the focus from what hurt you to what inspires you.

Start by exploring parts of yourself that have nothing to do with your trauma. What are your hobbies? What brings you joy? What are your dreams for the future? Lean into these aspects, even if it feels uncomfortable or unfamiliar at first.

Building a New Narrative

Framing yourself outside of trauma involves rewriting your narrative in a way that honors your resilience, growth, and strengths. It’s not about erasing your past but about choosing how you want to carry it forward.

Consider these steps:

  1. Identify Your Values: Reflect on what matters most to you. Is it creativity? Connection? Courage? Use your values as a compass for the life you want to create.
  2. Celebrate Your Strengths: Trauma survivors often develop incredible resilience, resourcefulness, and empathy. Recognize these qualities as evidence of your ability to thrive.
  3. Envision Your Future: Take time to imagine the life you want to live. What would it look like to live in alignment with your values, free from the weight of trauma dictating your every move?
  4. Shift Your Language: Pay attention to the words you use when describing yourself. Instead of focusing on being “broken” or “damaged,” use empowering language like “healing,” “resilient,” or “becoming.”

Finding Support

Framing yourself outside of trauma doesn’t mean going it alone. Lean on a support system—whether that’s friends, family, a therapist, or a support group. These relationships can remind you of who you are outside of your pain and provide encouragement as you move forward.

Conclusion

You are not defined by your trauma. It’s a chapter in your story, not the entire book. By reframing your identity, you reclaim your power to write the narrative of your life in a way that highlights your strengths, values, and dreams.

Healing is a journey, and while trauma may shape you, it does not have to limit you. The person you’re becoming is worth discovering—a person full of potential, joy, and wholeness.

About The Author

Ka'ra Johnson